She said "Do me a favor and ask if you need some help. Do me a favor and stop flattering yourself."

Journal,

You know this feeling, Xavier Beckingham. You open your eyes and it's like there's an invisible pane of plexiglass between between you and everyone else. You resist the urge to each out to someone and see if you can touch them anymore. You know it's irrational but for some reason you expect that if you tried to grab onto someone, you'd be stopped millimeters short by some invisible barrier. Or maybe you'd just pass on through them. It hurts your head to think about it, and you know you're probably just tired, so you close you're eyes and when you open them up, the haze has lifted and you pass it off as just another thing.

"Xavier," Thomas murmured in my left ear. My head snapped forward and my eyes flew open. I turned my head and saw Thomas staring at me anxiously. The plexiglass hadn't lifted. "Xavier, they called you down to the office."

I nodded and grabbed my jacket. I turned to face Marie-Claire, who was reading a book I had given her last weekend. She glanced up at me and when she met my eyes, she quickly turned her eyes back torward her book. I passed it off as nothing and left the classroom unceremoniously.

Halfway down the hall, I started to talk to myself. This isn't unusual when I'm out of it, like I am today. "What was that for?" I murmured to the empty hallway.

"Does she think that I'm getting in trouble for shagging some staff member? I haven't even done that recently!" I shook my head and continued walking. I turned the corner and the other ball dropped. "Oh shit."

This was it, wasn't it? I'd been aware that every day I was at this school was just one day closer to the administration figuring me out. Well, the curtains closing on me now, isn't it? I'm getting kicked out. This is why Marie-Claire couldn't meet my eyes. She knew I was oblivious.

"Fuck," I murmured. A teacher walking down the hallway in the opposite direction glared at me disapprovingly. "You got a fucking problem?" I spit out at him and continued walking to the headmaster's office.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Excuse me," the secretary said as I stared blankly out the window by the headmaster's office. "The headmaster will see you now."

I nodded and entered the room. The headmaster, a middle aged man who looked very much like his son, sat at his desk with a neutral expression on his face.

"Xavier Beckingham," he stated. "I'm surprised we've never met before." He motioned for me to sit down. "You have quite a reputation at this school," he said and flicked a folder open. "Your English teacher wrote down that she though you were a genius. A lazy genius who doesn't work to his full potential. Do you know what an honor it is to be called a genius at this type of school?"

"It's like being called the best whore in Bangkok," I replied sardonically and smiled innocently.

"You like doing that, doing you, Xavier? Pushing the envelope. Being provocative and flippant to your superiors," the headmaster said. "You have quite a laundry list of complaints and reprimands."

"I'm just misunderstood," I replied in an unctuous tone.

"Sexually exaggerated, insubordinate, lazy, and a real twat. It's funny, none of your teachers wrote down that you were just misunderstood."

"Sexually exaggerated?" I restated and smirked. "I can live with that."

"It's not a compliment," the headmaster said, doing everything in his power to not roll his eyes.

"It's funny, you could say the same thing about your son," I replied innocently. "He's an attractive boy, you know? You should be proud."

"If you're trying to suggest that I'm not aware of my son's escapades, you really must not think very highly of me. But you should know that your position in this school is on very shaky grounds and it would be very detrimental to your situation to become involved with my son."

I glared at him. Was he really telling me that he'd kick me out if I shagged his son? This certainly does make that situation more... interesting.

"You know," the headmaster continued, "your father is such an involved donor in the school. We'd hate to lose his charity. But we'd survive without him and we're not afraid to cut our losses."

I stared at the headmaster dumbfoundedly. "My father?"

"You may leave now, Beckingham."

"Wait, you said something about my father?" I snapped.

"Suzy, please escort Mr. Beckingham out of my office," he called. The secretary timidly entered.

"Wait!" I snapped. "My father? What do you know about my father? You stay the fuck away from him. I don't want anything to do with him!"

The headmaster rolled his eyes and closed the door in front of my face. What the fuck is going on?